Have you ever told yourself…
🌀 “I shouldn’t feel jealous.”
🌀 “I should know better by now.”
🌀 “I should be able to move on.”
You might think you’re being wise, because you’re being mindful of the fact that you should be more mature or you should have overcome something, but what you’re actually doing is emotionally bypassing—and it’s keeping you stuck.
What is Emotional Bypassing?
Emotional bypassing is when we suppress or dismiss our feelings because we think we shouldn’t feel them. Instead of processing emotions, we shame ourselves for having them.
Common signs of emotional bypassing:
🚩 You rationalize instead of feeling (“It’s not a big deal, I should be over it”).
🚩 You avoid discomfort by staying busy or distracted.
🚩 You tell yourself you’re “too evolved” to feel certain things.
But here’s the truth: Your emotions aren’t the problem. Avoiding them is.
Why Emotional Bypassing Keeps You Stuck
When you suppress emotions, they don’t disappear—they get stored in your body and mind. They manifest as:
🔸 Overthinking and self-doubt
🔸 Unexplained burnout or exhaustion
🔸 Resentment that bubbles up later
🔸 Inability to make confident decisions
Ignoring emotions doesn’t make them go away. It just delays the inevitable. Your emotions are like messengers that tell you that there’s something you need to look at. The discomfort is there to teach you a valuable lesson that will propel you to another level – that you are seeking.
What to Do Instead: Feel to Heal
Instead of bypassing, we need to practice emotional validation—a process that helps us move through emotions instead of avoiding them.
3-Step Emotional Validation Process
1️⃣ Name it: “I feel ____.”
2️⃣ Normalize it: “It makes sense that I feel this way.”
3️⃣ Navigate it: “What is this emotion asking of me?”
Example: The Emotion of Jealousy
🚫 Old mindset: “I shouldn’t feel jealous.”
✅ New mindset: “Jealousy is showing me where I feel insecure. What can I do to address this?”
When you validate emotions, you release their hold on you. You walk through the valley—not around it.
Want to Break Free from Emotional Bypassing?
If you’re ready to stop dismissing your emotions and start leading with clarity and confidence, message me the word ‘Bypass.’ Let’s get you unstuck.